Ep. 122 - Stay Grounded In A Chaotic World

The world feels like it is running at maximum volume, and a lot of us are asking the same question: how do you stay grounded without checking out? We get real about what constant chaos does to your mind and body, why it leaks into your reactions, and how quickly your peace disappears when you give your attention to every headline, hot take, and argument you cannot control.

We wrestle with the trap of truth seeking in a noisy culture. The deeper you dig, the more you realize how much you do not know, and that can create anxiety instead of clarity. Along the way we share a simple fable that nails the point: trying to fix discomfort the wrong way can leave you with bigger holes than you started with. We also go philosophical in plain language, touching perception and the way each of us experiences “reality” through our own beliefs, values, and filters.

Then we land on something practical and oddly hopeful: tighten your circle, set boundaries, and be the light where you actually live. We swap stories about everyday kindness that sticks with people for years, and we talk about why self-care is not selfish when it helps you show up better for others. If you want anxiety relief, stress management tools, and a mindset for protecting your peace without losing your humanity, hit play. Subscribe, share this with a friend who feels overwhelmed, and leave us a review with one small thing that helps you stay grounded.

Transcript

Living Through Chaos Without Breaking

SPEAKER_00 0:09

Hello and welcome to Clean Your Fucking House, bitch, with Nancy, Kevin, and Lou. In our program, we get real about the challenges of life and living. Your mind is the most powerful tool you have to ensure you are on your desired path for success and satisfaction. Yet, from the day you are born, you gradually and subconsciously fill it with tons of useless shit that gets in your way. Why is that? How can you clean that mess up? We'll show you how. Get ready to clean your fucking house. Hello, listeners. Welcome to another episode of Clean Your Fucking House, bitch. So much is going on in the world. We have economic chaos. We have wars, though some people don't want to call them wars. They feel like wars. We have, oh my goodness, people running out into the streets protesting and doing all kinds of shit. And how do you just kind of get through it all, cut through it all, and basically just stay grounded. Live your life, do your thing, and and get through it all. This is a topic that we have periodically talked about ourselves as a group, but probably not so much more than just before this recording. And we thought we'd share our own thoughts on the subject. This is um, you know, maybe one of just deep thinking versus any kind of educational slant to it, if you will. Um, more entertaining and again opening up our minds to just being open. I'm not sure if I said a lot there. That makes sense.

unknown 2:00

That's perfect.

SPEAKER_04 2:01

Oh, you know, you said I did say a lot, yes.

SPEAKER_00 2:06

Would anyone like to start with their thoughts? I mean, goodness, we can just repeat some of the things we had before.

SPEAKER_02 2:14

I mean, how much how much do you think that like so all the things we just discussed before we started recording, right? Like how crazy things seem to be even reality itself is questionable at this point, right? Like there's nothing that I could see that I'm just like that's absolutely not fucking possible. Like there's nothing that isn't possible to occur in reality. So how much of it are we manifesting? How much uh how much are we fucking up Nancy's reality by bringing up all this shit?

SPEAKER_01 2:50

Because he's saying that because I feel so unaware. I've segmented myself off from the BS, if you will, because it just irritates, you know, when when Lou says, how do we get through it? Well, I have to segment myself from it because I find it irritating and aggravating, and then I feel that not only in my mind, in my body, and then it comes out of the way I react to others.

SPEAKER_00 3:15

So I try to not let it bunch me up and that kind of begs the question: is it better to be removed from that chaos and drama and save yourself a certain degree of stress and anxiety, or to be aware of sort of what's going on, even if we're not able to fully decipher it or cut through the BS, cut through the noise to get to the signal to get to the truth?

SPEAKER_02 3:43

Like so the problem with getting to the truth is if if you've ever been on that journey, uh I'm speaking for myself, but I I feel like it's common. But the more that you unpack, the more you realize you don't fucking know. It just creates more questions. And then Nancy's talking about taking her power back. How much of our power we are we giving away by giving our energy to something that is just gonna open up more unknowns, right?

SPEAKER_04 4:19

Right.

SPEAKER_02 4:20

Or how much power do we have? Can we actually extinguish the things that we don't want in our reality by not giving them any energy or consciousness? Is that possible?

SPEAKER_01 4:35

It's not because we're uh a small fraction of the things that give focus to the bullshit in this world. So it feels impossible to minimize the shit that happens in the world around us because we we can't we can't get rid of it, I guess, is but we can for ourselves. Maybe we can't change the things that are happening in the greater world around us, but we can choose how to tighten our own circle and eliminate that stuff from our daily experience. But it but that ties back to what Lou asked as well. And you need balance. Like, yes, you have to have awareness to all the crazy things that are happening out there so you can have some perspective on what is happening in the world around us. And then we have to, and I say this like I know how to do it, I don't. Um then we have to figure out how how do we live in our circle of life without being overly impacted by the negativity of all this craziness that happens around us. And where is it important to stand up and participate and take action against something we completely disagree with? And where do we step back and remove ourselves from it because it's a waste of energy. And and that's I don't know who has the answers to any of that.

The Blanket With Holes Story

SPEAKER_00 5:55

It's kind of funny as I was hearing Kevin talk about the deeper we go on a journey of truth-sinking seeking, the more questions we have, and perhaps the more confused or otherwise, the more we struggle. It reminded me of a story I read, uh, I think it's probably a fable or something like that, where there's a moral to the story kind of thing. But it's uh about somebody who has a blanket and the blanket has three holes in it. And of course, this person needs this blanket to stay warm in the winter, and the blanket's covering them, but the cold is getting through the holes and trying to find a solution to this problem. And they decide, hmm, I know what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna cut out the holes. So they cut out the holes and create bigger holes, and that's you know, then you kind of know where the story's going more. I'm not sure if that's a great analogy, but it just It is, you know, that the more you like you said, the m the deeper you go, the more it just creates a bigger problem or a bigger question mark, maybe.

SPEAKER_04 7:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 7:02

How are you guys sure that anything exists outside of your perception?

SPEAKER_01 7:09

Why does it matter?

SPEAKER_02 7:16

We're pretty certain that each other exists, but outside of that, and we're not seeing each other or talking to each other, how do we know it doesn't just stop existing?

SPEAKER_00 7:28

Yeah, that's an area I guess I I never ventured into that goes beyond um my comprehension, but you you know, did didn't we have an episode once where we talked about how and there's a neuroscience explanation or definition for this thing where we're all living in our own realities and we're all thinking things are going a certain way. Uh almost like each of us may be looking at a thing, but getting drawing three different conclusions because it's our own reality that we derive those conclusions based on our own value system, mindset, beliefs, etc. And maybe that plays into it a little bit. Because if you would ask me that question 10, 20, 30 years ago and said, What the fuck are you crazy? What are you talking about? Crazy talk there, mister. And I don't I think myself, I have kind of changed my own perspective on things, which maybe is I'm breaking free. I took, what is it, the red pill, blue pill, which one break helps you to break free in the matrix? And see the light, gain truth. But yeah, I I'm more open to other possibilities that many years ago I would have maybe once considered too very far-fetched. I'm not sure if that answered the question, but it's a difficult question.

SPEAKER_02 8:51

I feel like you were talking about phenomenology. The only thing that'd be a great name for us really phenomenology?

Building Boundaries And Local Community

SPEAKER_01 9:02

Oh, and you yeah, that's a great word. And then and then Kevin, you asked is anything outside of our own perception real? But no, not to not to us, right?

SPEAKER_02 9:14

And so then again how do you define real question is can we extinguish the undesirables?

SPEAKER_01 9:26

If well that comes back to if if it's possible to create a boundary and live in a um community that mirrors your values and activities and creates a safe space where you don't have to embrace as often or as frequently, maybe all these things that create duress. Um, yes, you'd like to think.

SPEAKER_00 9:51

I think that's uh you hit a very important note there, Nancy, is that over time, and I'm getting back to something you said pre-recording, Kevin. I believe it was pre-recording about horse and buggy back in the day, is we were much less connected or maybe connected's the best word I can think of. Years ago, people did live in communities and probably never saw people in other communities, and people naturally developed groups of of organized communities, if you will. But over time, it's like the what is it, Kevin Bacon analogy, degrees of separate six degrees of separation. We we've our degrees of separation, I believe that was him, yeah. It's less and less and less where unless you're a Ted Kaczynski living in a cabin in the woods, who knows where, you it's hard to get off that grid.

SPEAKER_02 10:49

Yeah, maybe you don't have to. I'm speaking from the perspective of being okay, having this conversation, you know, feeling good about life. Uh but sometimes the sky's falling, so my opinion would change. But maybe uh we could be like that light in our own communities and carry ourselves a certain way and uplift uh the people around us to create change just in our circle, just in in our communities. Does that make sense?

SPEAKER_01 11:24

Totally. That's that weird balance. Like, how do you find it? You have to be aware and you have to do things to make a difference because you can't just totally well.

SPEAKER_02 11:33

Maybe you can't find it, you have to be it.

Small Kindness That Spreads

SPEAKER_01 11:35

But you're but you can also be it in your community, yeah. And that will spread because it will it will impact others, and others are gonna impact others, so that will spread, and so you can make a difference.

SPEAKER_02 11:46

I was thinking one day randomly, I think I went to a gas station, but I was like, what would happen? Like, what would happen to my life if I tried to just be like the most uplifting part of someone's day? Even a stranger, like a smile or just being super friendly, like you know what would happen. Impact would that have? You know, what what do you think? I don't know. I think that person might feel less shitty if they're having a shitty day. Yeah, maybe they'll be thinking about like that. Was a nice person, you know, that didn't have to do that when that person dropped off the picture at our house. I told you guys, or Nancy, I told you about that, right?

SPEAKER_01 12:30

Yeah, oh yeah, very cool.

SPEAKER_02 12:31

I think Lisa too. No freaking, no phone number to call back or nothing, just uh an act of kindness. That was super awesome. And that makes us want to be like, how can we, you know, now you're thinking about what could I do for someone to like make their day a little bit better.

A Speech That Changed Someone

SPEAKER_00 12:50

You know, that's a that's a great point in terms of the whole underlying premise of our discussion is cutting through the bowl, staying grounded, not letting stuff kind of get to us in a way that negatively impacts our health, our mind, or whatnot, it is just being that beacon of kindness and hope and and and all that. I you never know what impact you may have in someone's life. And I know when if you ever do get to discover at even just one example of that, how satisfying that is and how good it makes us feel. I went to a company function recently, it was at the end of February. And the company I'm at now, for our listeners out there who may not know, I worked at this company years ago and then uh departed at one point to take on some other ventures and rejoined them. I left on a good note. I didn't burn any bridges. Um, they welcomed me back. It's a great company, great group of people. And at this function I was at in February, I ran into a colleague that I hadn't seen in many years. And even though I had seen her at a couple of uh functions in at the company in a business setting, this was at uh a conference and there was that social time cocktail hour kind of thing. So, of course, conversations are different during cocktail time than they are in the office. And she actually shared with me, this was uh a little connection to Toastmasters when I first went into Toastmasters, how she came to an open house for Toastmasters, where we were looking to, of course, expand membership and whatnot. And she came and she was in the audience. And I gave a speech, and she said, Lou, I'll never forget that time. And my goodness, she probably said 15 years ago or some ungodly amount of time that I can't remember what speech it was, what time, whatever. And you know, that speech had such an impact on me. And I can't remember if it was just in terms of her joining the group, maybe and getting over her fear of public speaker, whatever the case may be, or that the subject matter touched her in a personal way. I just because at the point she shared that, it's not like I completely zoned out, but I more or less just like, oh my God. So as I'm thinking of this oh my god moment, the rest of the conversation was like Charlie Brown's teacher, you know, wah, wah, wah, wah, because I'm unfortunately was in that kind of mode. And I just but remember, wow, I actually touched someone's life in that way that I had never been approached like that before in all my life. I just thought it was amazing.

SPEAKER_01 15:28

More than you know with things that you do every day. And that goes, you know, I know you're going right back to what Kevin said. Does it does that make a difference? And can how will other people feel? And hopefully they feel something, but they might not feel it right away. It might be later, it might be right away. But how do you feel? Like by choosing, you know, the other people-centered um aspect of really it helps take us out of our rut and puts our focus on something positive, and positive attracts positive, negative attracts negative, so do something positive.

SPEAKER_00 16:04

Other people centered, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 16:06

I still remember about like I don't know, 15 years ago, maybe more. I was in the drive-thru at Taco Bell and I ordered like$30 worth of food, and the car in front of me paid. Wow. And that's a lot of Taco. Well, I mean, back then that was a lot of Taco Bell.

SPEAKER_00 16:27

Yeah. I can't believe Taco Bell's menu had that.

SPEAKER_02 16:29

I still remember it. I just remembered that I remembered. That's really funny.

SPEAKER_01 16:34

Yeah, so you know if you chose a day to just be kind to whoever's around you in whatever way, is it gonna make a difference? Yes.

Materialism Versus Meaningful Connection

SPEAKER_02 16:44

Yeah. You know, we do talk a lot in our episodes about like ourselves and growth and how to take care of ourselves, which I still do believe is the most important thing, but we don't talk about that element as often as we do just kind of filling our own cups.

SPEAKER_01 17:05

Um giving back element.

SPEAKER_02 17:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 17:08

Yeah. You know, and that actually I think could be a part of it for me. Uh uh again, with our pre-recording conversation, some of what we talked about was how it feels like society has changed in certain ways that are just different than they were years ago. And it's hard to understand or otherwise realize whether it's a reality that it feels different or just the way it works, or whatever the case may be. But one element of it that little by little kind of digs at me in a negative way is the fact that it feels like selfishness has become more epidemic. And maybe I'm completely off. It just feels that way. And of course, in in our economy here, it's all about capitalism, but uh just so much kind of comes across my daily uh, you know, emails and and different feeds and stuff like that that have to do with personal growth in a materialistic monetary way that just feels less uh of something that would be make our lives purposeful and enjoyable. Uh that I think that's part of it for me. It just feels like there's a a greater expansion of a bit of selfishness. So, you know what? What's the way to maybe that could be why, even in my own mind, I think the world itself has become a little tougher or challenging. So, you know what? Yeah, turn it on its head, turn it into selflessness and helping others. Maybe that's for me, that would be my solution.

SPEAKER_02 18:43

Well, everything is material that comes like a lot of what we come across is material, whether it's looks or money or cars or how like all that shit. Right. I just want to point out that taking care of yourself first, I don't see as selfish, but as long as it's not at the expense of anyone else, you know, like definitely go inward, take care of you. And I think this podcast is part of all three of our journey of trying to help others uncover the deeper meanings, like the beyond material that never fills anything. It just keeps you wanting more and more. But when you can find your little hobbies that bring you joy that don't have to cost a lot of money, or you can build good connections with like-minded people that uplift you, like those are the things, those are the most important things.

SPEAKER_01 19:48

That's what saves us or protects us from the rest of that stuff we're referencing that feels overwhelming sometimes.

SPEAKER_00 20:01

And maybe we have in one or more of our episodes touched someone else's life in a positive way that I'd like to think that that's true.

SPEAKER_01 20:12

I would like to think so too. That's part of why we're here. We're we could talk to each other all the time, but we're here to share so that if anyone of you out there listening to us has some sort of uh impact from it, that would feel good.

Closing Takeaways And Goodbye

SPEAKER_00 20:28

That would, yeah. Yeah, wow, okay. Well, cutting through the BS, cutting through the chaos, cutting through the drama and really staying grounded and being authentic, being present, a lot of things we talk about and and just um I guess living a happy life is really what it's all about. We hope uh all of you enjoyed today's episode. Wow, you know, this was really for me personally, just something that stretched my own boundaries in terms of of uh thinking and whatnot. So yeah, this is great. This is so, you know, both of you impact my life in a positive way. So I love you guys. Um, but yeah, this is definitely the highlight of my week. And I hope our listeners got a lot out of this as well. You know, I I kind of mentioned up front there may be less of an educational slant, but I think I may be wrong. You know, much of what we talked about, everything probably has a bit of education to it. So we hope you all enjoyed it, found it entertaining and educational and engaging. We hope you join us for our next one. Bye for now.