Clean Your F*cking House B*tch

Ep. 87 - Unraveling the Fabric of Resilience and Mental Toughness

January 20, 2024 Kevin Anderson
Clean Your F*cking House B*tch
Ep. 87 - Unraveling the Fabric of Resilience and Mental Toughness
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Resilience and mental toughness: while they may seem like two sides of the same coin, the unique tapestry of each trait weaves into the fabric of our psyche. Prepare to unravel the mystery behind bouncing back and forging ahead, as we share insights and personal stories that illuminate the distinction. 

Speaker 1:

Hello and welcome to Clean your Fucking House bitch with Nancy, kevin and Lou. In our program we get real about the challenges of life and living. Your mind is the most powerful tool you have to ensure you are on your desired path for success and satisfaction. Yet from the day you are born, you gradually and subconsciously fill it with tons of useless shit that gets in your way. Why is that? How can you clean that mess up? We'll show you how. Get ready to clean your fucking house.

Speaker 2:

Hello and welcome. I feel like those are loose words as I say them, but they are meant. The three of us welcome you this episode. Today we want to talk about resiliency versus mental toughness. We'll explore the differences and really take a moment to understand what each of them are and when we might lean into one versus the other, just as an initiator, if you will. Resiliency is that ability to spring back. We have resilience. We can come back into shape after being beat up by something difficult. Mental toughness is that ability to push through, be strong and work through adversity. There's some overlap in what the two of these things are, but definitely some differences as well. Lou, I'm going to you first, just because I have the privilege of seeing the question marks rolling. When you think of resiliency, what do you think of?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I probably should have put on my poker face for those of you who can't see us.

Speaker 1:

I had a furrowed brow as Nancy was explaining the concepts make. It's not that I don't understand them or don't get them, but I was thinking. What you said is, with the overlap, I'm like, wow, there seems like there's a large degree of overlap. When you said resiliency is bouncing back, that's when I'm like, okay, that's really the clear distinction for me is you've already been through something and you have the mental toughness to bounce back from that thing, not to use the same words as the other item there, but having the mental capacity to then bounce back from the thing different from the, say, when you're presented with a new challenge, one that you haven't encountered before, and then perhaps relying on the mental tools and strategies that you have developed as a result of experience and other observations, or simply maybe hearing other people's experiences, whatever we've accumulated in our own mental toolbox would then help us deal with a new struggle. So there really is the key distinction for me, but end of the day, sorry.

Speaker 2:

Well, as you were talking, I just had this new vision also of the mental toughness you could have, the strength and endurance to get through a thing and just be depleted at the end. It makes me think of those mutters, competitions, really exhaustive exercise and exposure and those people had the strength and endurance to do that. But at the end they're spaghetti, they're wet spaghetti. So definitely resilience. You could come through a bit and still have energy left.

Speaker 1:

That's a good distinction too. I guess I never thought of that.

Speaker 2:

I was going to say does that make them feel more separate, does that define them a little bit more, or?

Speaker 1:

separate. It does for me, because resilience implies that you got through it and that you are hopefully at least where you were before. I mean you could be hopefully better. Maybe you could even be a little less then, but you're still. You're over something as mental toughness. Just to me, the words imply that you have a certain capacity to deal with something, but it doesn't necessarily mean you'll be back to where you started, if that.

Speaker 2:

Right, yes, that would be a fair way to put it. Yes, Interesting.

Speaker 3:

I found two things that helped kind of shed some light on the distinction. The first thing I found was something online All mentally tough individuals are resilient, but not all resilient individuals are mentally tough.

Speaker 2:

I would have expected it to be the opposite, based on what I had read, but okay either way. Well, it's saddened.

Speaker 3:

What do you think you could be mentally tough. If you're mentally tough, you're going to be resilient, right? No matter what the obstacles are, you're going to overcome the advert. I'm confusing myself now.

Speaker 2:

I think both are true, because then I think, if you're resilient, you work through whatever the obstacles are and you have that ability to spring back to where you started, like you said, or maybe even beyond, or maybe forth. It's a quandary. It's a quandary, you're muted.

Speaker 1:

Sorry, is there a word missing perhaps when it comes to mental toughness, to help clarify further what I mean by that is mentally tough enough, like resilience kind of implies like that there's a clear defining line between successfully getting back to where you were before, like you bounced back at a minimum level, if that makes sense. But could mental toughness imply just that you have to be tough enough, or something like that, to really qualify as being resilient? I think the truth in that that you are.

Speaker 2:

You're tough enough to get through it, but you might not. And that toughness carried you through it. But you might be depleted when you're done. You might be like I got you and need to recover versus resilient is the idea that you're going to be able to spring back sooner. Maybe you do with the mental toughness as well, but not as readily as the resilient person.

Speaker 1:

Like I know. For that reason.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

You know, like if it's a new situation, that you're just depleting yourself because you're you're dealing with something that you never dealt with before. Perhaps.

Speaker 2:

That that.

Speaker 1:

I would hope that. If, yeah, you know, I would hope that. Well, I mean bouncing. Well, see, now I'm. I think I'm confusing myself now, because bouncing back would imply that you're bouncing back from a situation that could be new. Could be new, I mean, it could be a repeat situation, but it doesn't have to be, it could also be something new. Sure.

Speaker 3:

The other thing I was going to bring up that I found is mental toughness is about performing well in the face of stress and adversity, while resilience is about overcoming adversity and emerging stronger as a result. Did you see that too?

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And that emerging stronger aligns with that feel of you can bounce back to your original form, like you have that ability but that toughness. You worked through it but you might still be. I keep using the word depleted, but you know, exhausted, tired, sad, angry, hurt.

Speaker 1:

So you're still there, but you're like spent.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you did it.

Speaker 1:

That's interesting that Kevin used the word you came back stronger, because then that changes my view of it, in that I was thinking you could come back just to something that's at least on the positive side, but not necessarily better than where you were before, but stronger implies you came back greater than where you were before.

Speaker 2:

Maybe, yeah, which, if you think about it that way, then it sounds like there's sustainability in resilience and that ties back to a shared before about, about, about someone that I work with who always talks about how they feel their resilience bank and so all the self-care things that they do for themselves when work gets hard, when life gets hard, when an injury happens, when food gets off track, you know, when all of these things happen in life, having the resilience bank full, having the energy, having the positive mindset, having had steady sleep, having good work ethic all make that all those challenges move forward more easily. Versus you get surprised in a meeting at work and you power through a meeting where you get put on the spot. You did it, you were tough, but you walk out of that room going WTF.

Speaker 3:

Interesting.

Speaker 1:

And would that mean you're not say technically resilient, you're just tough enough to power through?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3:

I think that would kind of be the distinction for me, like resilience to me is like an overarching, like philosophy that one carries for oneself, like just pushing through no matter what.

Speaker 2:

I mean, I think about mental toughness mental. That sounds more like mental toughness, because you're just pushing through, you might end out exhausted. Resiliency is about giving the time for self-care and recovery.

Speaker 1:

So then it could be almost like a continued strong mental toughness as opposed to just going to go up and down.

Speaker 2:

But yeah, yeah, that's, and I think that, based on what I've read, feeling like that aligns with with what I've read you read some confusing shit apparently. Well, these overlap. They're complicated, like you know. If life was simple, I'll be in different places.

Speaker 1:

Do you have any advice for our listeners as well as me, because I love this topic in terms of say, develop further, develop, well, developing at all, or further developing and strengthening resiliency and even mental toughness.

Speaker 2:

I think self-care is the thing, and then really recognizing that self-care can come in so many shapes and forms. It's not just about a massage or a mani-pedi.

Speaker 3:

Do you think it depends on, like, the tasks that we have to accomplish, like you mentioned, like fatigue with certain things right, or approaching it with mental toughness or resilience. But I feel like there are certain tasks that appeal to us on a deeper psychological level that we can perform and put a lot into but leave us feeling fulfilled afterwards, right, like kind of us filling our cup, whereas there are certain items that we might have to perform that leave us feeling exhausted or drained.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, exactly because you know what, lou? I want to go back to that. Do I have advice? I'm going to say no, but I also have an answer.

Speaker 3:

I lean out of offering people advice because yeah, lou, didn't you listen to the last episode, bro, on advice.

Speaker 1:

Well, I was just thinking in terms of developing or building, like you said. I mean, self-care is a great bit of advice for a lot of things in terms of.

Speaker 2:

Exactly and to take that mental health in general, Totally right, and that would be, you know, checking in with yourself and asking what gives me ease, what brings a tiny increase in joy, what allows me to relax, where's my heart center, at peace? What do I like to do physically, you know, well, I wish I could, because I saw posts sorry, kev, earlier today and it was naming, you know showed work, environment and how your brain is dried up, dehydrated, and then it showed 30 minutes of outdoor time and and already, how your brain is then replenished and so all those things you mentioned, those refuel you right or make or reground you right.

Speaker 3:

It's kind of like a reset. But really the only way to get better, become more resilient or become more mentally tough is to put yourself in situations that require you to be resilient or mentally tough. Right, like you're not going to get more resilient unless you're faced with adversity. You have to have that as a variable in the equation.

Speaker 2:

I'm going to say yes. However, that feels like we don't need to sign ourselves up for adversity, but thinking of putting that into relationship, of the most simplistic thing. I always talk about hiking half dome. Right, I'm not ready today. I can walk flat, I can walk the short hills, I can walk some steeper hills, but I'm not ready for the steepness of half dome. By stretching your abilities, by getting outside your comfort zone, by expanding your horizon, you don't have to directly hit adversity. If that makes sense, well, you kind of are, though on certain days.

Speaker 2:

Words made me made the hair on my back raise Sure 100 percent.

Speaker 3:

But even on the days that you're like and again, we always talk about compassion for ourselves but on the days that you say you set a roadmap for success for yourself and you know that you have been realistic with your goals, and on a day that you don't feel like going and doing whatever the next stage of your development is, but you still go out and go, I feel like you are facing even if it's self-inflicted adversity of not wanting to go and you still push yourself to go. That could be adversity, right.

Speaker 1:

For sure. In that kind of situation you can at least stop when the adversity is too great, If that makes any sense, meaning, okay, I'll go hiking. And then you know what, if I literally hit a wall five minutes into this exercise of facing adversity on purpose, I can turn it off. But that's a great example of testing yourself, because then, when an adversity happens that you have, say, no control over, hopefully you're ready for it.

Speaker 3:

You feel like you're still Lou in that scenario. Do you feel like you're still building resilience and mental toughness if you go out to accomplish a task and you're like I'm not feeling it today and then you just end up stopping.

Speaker 1:

I would. For me, I would say yeah, especially when you're not up for it. Seems like that's a huge test of mental toughness.

Speaker 3:

It's just getting up and going at it. And doing it, yeah, if you don't accomplish the entire goal of what you set out to do.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, oftentimes, you know, we'll talk about building healthier habits, with the baby step approach for some, and with again getting back to a fitness routine. As often the example we use simply just getting up and going to the door in preparation of doing a walk around the block could take a lot of mental toughness to make that happen. So, you know, it's almost like it makes me think of that Like you're building up because you're doing a little at a time.

Speaker 3:

So the adversity really sounds like it could be the neurology that we've created over time in the form of habits that we have right.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, if you build the positive neural pathways, they supersede the negative thoughts.

Speaker 1:

Or doubt your ability.

Speaker 1:

And isn't it interesting how that works. It's our bodies, are our bodies, they don't change. Now, certainly when it comes to, say, a physical experiment like that where you're hiking your body may, if you haven't done it at all, you're certainly exposing yourself to something that you've never done. So what could use muscles in the body that you haven't used? It could certainly be a challenge. But let's say you have done it and you just haven't done it for, you know, six months. I think our bodies remember what that is and could still do it. But then the mind might go to a place oh, I don't wanna do it, I don't wanna do it. Yet when you do it and you start to do it consistently, I'm seeing, like man, this is no problem at all. I can keep this going, and it's amazing how the mind almost like tricks or fools us or makes us think that we can't do something when we really can.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, and you completely eliminate certain neural pathways that you've built up, or do they just get overpowered, like you said, by the ones that you use more often?

Speaker 2:

That's a good question. I don't know the answer.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I think of them like developing cobwebs or shrinking. You know we use a lot of analogy like that, but it and maybe the literal analogy might be there's less sparks flying with those neural pathways.

Speaker 2:

Well, I think there was data that did say that they do shrink, that an unused neural pathway we'll just name it that is going to shrink, but I don't know if they go away or if it's just like a path in the woods gets overgrown if it's not traveled, and so the path well traveled is the one you see and get on to more easily. I don't, yeah, I don't know if they disappear or not. I would like to think-.

Speaker 1:

I remember sorry.

Speaker 2:

I would like to think they do go away, just because I don't want all that extra clutter back in the morning back there.

Speaker 1:

A house cleaning exercise. I love it. I remember reading something some time ago that said sometime between when we're born and the age of something, two, four could be something like that. It could be very. Maybe it's four months, maybe it's a matter of months or something.

Speaker 1:

Anyway, the paper was something to the effect of where we're automatically have like, let's say, 400 billion fresh pathways that are ready to be used. It's almost like a clean slate and almost like everyone has equal chance of being fired, which makes sense. It's almost like your brain. You have no knowledge. When you're first born, you are the sponge or soaking up things or learning things. But within a short span of time of one's life, that 400 billion shrinks dramatically to, let's say, two million. And that's an extreme example, but it's only meant to be an example, meaning a good 98% of those pathways literally shrink close to nothing because they're unused, undeveloped, unnurtured, whatever you wanna say. And I find that kind of fascinating because that seems to speak to the fact. And it never said they go away. Well, maybe that was the implied thing. It's a good question.

Speaker 1:

As opposed to just a closed road that isn't traveled anymore. I'm not sure, cause I would think the structure of the brain it's not like the cells disappear or the neurons disappear. I think they're still there.

Speaker 2:

But like our skin does.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, good point. Or maybe they're repurposed and used for a different pathway.

Speaker 2:

Well, so what we've just confirmed is none of us are neuro scientists. I don't know.

Speaker 1:

I don't know, no, but we love the subject matter.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, we do know, though, that we can expand positive thinking and that we're all capable of it. That we know for sure.

Speaker 1:

With continued exposure you do develop a strong neuro pathway to some activity that makes it easier and easier to do, more comfortable, less painful, less mental toughness is needed.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, exactly Because you have more resiliency.

Speaker 1:

Can one have mental toughness without resiliency, and vice versa?

Speaker 2:

I think you can have, based on what we kind of talked through, I think you can have mental toughness without resiliency. But I think if you have resiliency you automatically have mental toughness because you can power through a difficult situation, because you have the resiliency to do it and bounce back.

Speaker 1:

So then, having mental toughness without resiliency means you, I think. As you shared earlier, you managed to kind of get through something, but you just to plead it. So it's you're not back to the same degree of mental toughness where you started, like your toolbox now is gone.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, okay, you can't get there. You can get there, but you're not there in that moment.

Speaker 1:

And you have to recharge or refuel to build it back up.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, so resiliency is the longterm desired sustainable thing we wanna build for ourselves.

Speaker 1:

Like-. Do either of you have a story to share in terms of where your mental toughness has been significantly tested?

Speaker 2:

Oh, tested, oh lots of places all the time. But I was thinking about that you were gonna go towards where we build our resiliency, and I was thinking of Kevin in the woods. Kevin, we haven't heard you talk for all while now about liking to run on a trail in the woods.

Speaker 3:

That's true. I actually haven't really been out in the woods, and I was thinking about that the other day actually.

Speaker 1:

Well, that would be tough now with the Chicago smell. Now it does.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, we have to bring it up, nancy. It's shitty and snowy outside, what's-.

Speaker 2:

Big storm coming our way. Folks, I'm sorry. Where is resiliency Lou?

Speaker 1:

You know, I as that's actually when I asked you about examples you're like oh my God, there's so many and I'm thinking I'm sure I've had many. But what I find amazing is nothing comes to mind immediately as like oh my, there was that time when I was, and yet I'm sure there's many as well, but-.

Speaker 2:

What about the 10 in the morning?

Speaker 1:

Well, you know what? That's certainly one. That is an example of something I went through back in 2018, when, after having let myself go for many years, or just over time, with life and my not exercising and getting out there enough, I got to a point where, wow, I need to get back and get in shape. And it was weird, though, at the time, I literally just made the decision one morning, get up at five, go on the treadmill and just walk, and then and I let myself do the walking, maybe a week, two weeks, maybe more, and then let that lead to something greater, through in some setups, through in some calisthenics, some other things and let it grow from there.

Speaker 1:

But, in looking back, it was interesting for the fact that many days, it was like, nah, not today, not today, not today. I wasn't ready, and that toughness wasn't there. And then, one day, I just said I'm going, and I can't, for the life of me, though, think what was the change or what happened or what went on that all of a sudden, you know, usually you think, oh, you hit rock bottom is the typical thing that most people will say. You know, whatever it is drinking this or that, there was nothing that happened that made me.

Speaker 2:

From the outside I would say it's not even that. From the outside, in hearing about your experience, it sounds like you started and it's just. You know I don't like to like into a child walking, but when a child starts walking they're not great initially. Take some time, you know, and you'd started and you had some starts and stops and you were better some days than others and then all of a sudden you were just like I've got this and then it was easy to choose to do it and it was easier physically to do it and so the two came together. It sounds more like that to me than rock bottom. I don't hear rock bottom in there.

Speaker 1:

No, there, certainly wasn't. And you know another thing about it was also during the time of our Somsanos program, and I was like you know, not only should I be helping others through this program, I should be living this program. And that's when I thought I need to. You know, practice what I preach.

Speaker 2:

And I guess I would say, listening to that, that mental toughness is choice. You made a choice that was mental toughness.

Speaker 1:

So then that begs the question can one choose to develop or strengthen? Or it sounds like then.

Speaker 2:

Yes, I think I don't without you you don't even have to finish your sentence and I'm gonna say yes.

Speaker 1:

Well, because oftentimes you know you'll hear someone being naturally tough, whether it's physical or whatever. There's almost like maybe that's just words thrown out there and not necessarily true in that way, I mean, it seems like oh, I think you're going to get all these different levels of it for sure.

Speaker 1:

And certainly develop different degrees based on experiences, whatever those. Yeah, and you know there's been other situations in my life where I know there's been gosh. Yeah, you know it's funny now that I think about it. Woo, all of a sudden they're coming in earlier in life where there was a. You know where I'm gonna go to.

Speaker 2:

Family, we love you.

Speaker 1:

We're dealing with families, yeah, where mental toughness was definitely required. But I will say the other aspect to that is, I think I've sharpened my mental toughness, if that's a accurate way of describing it, meaning I actually had to adjust and change and rearrange aspects of how I built my own toolbox in order to deal with mentally challenging situations.

Speaker 2:

You filled your resilience bank, you had some energy ready when you needed it, versus always feeling depleted. I mean you could compare it to your gas tank. We don't run our cars to empty. We fill the car before it's empty. We're not going to get caught somewhere where we don't have fuel to continue going, and everybody does it in different places. But this is also something that has been talked about with hunger and fullness, and if you let your body get physically depleted, that you're so hungry that you get hangry, that's not a desirable state to be, and it's good to find the level and build a food routine that allows you to have energy all the time, versus getting so depleted.

Speaker 1:

I actually did let my car go to empty once and it completely ran out of gas. My very first car. I don't know. It was like no, I can keep going, I can keep going. Two more miles, two more miles, three more miles. Pretty soon I'm like it won't start and I didn't know what was going on.

Speaker 3:

Haven't we all done that?

Speaker 1:

Have we all, and I never let it happen again.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

So that's it. Everyone lets it happen once and that's it.

Speaker 2:

It was also before cars had these light indicators. Right, you had to be able to engage and trust it.

Speaker 1:

The needle, yeah, when that was. I'm blaming my family again, because I remember somebody saying oh, when the needle's on me, you're not necessarily any, you can go another 30 miles.

Speaker 3:

Not always true. I'm trying to formulate a question and we'll see what comes out here, but I want to ask both of you. So what sparked it was the fact that, if you were to ask me about resilience and how often or when was I resilient? I can think of pretty much every area of my life. Very consistently. I feel like I'm having to be resilient with. So is that? Where does that come from? Is that a challenge Like I can't imagine? My life is just in complete chaos compared to other people, but I do feel like I have a need to be resilient constantly. And obviously, right, I do get out of my comfort zone, I try new shit, but there are a lot of things in my life that are, I feel, like, out of my hands and I'm like I'm going to make it through this. I have to get there right.

Speaker 2:

So it's mindset.

Speaker 1:

Wow, so you don't feel that there's no area of your life where you're just coasting?

Speaker 3:

No.

Speaker 1:

Wow.

Speaker 2:

He's going to put an effort in. He may not be at the pace he wants to be, but he's making it happen.

Speaker 3:

So that's what you think? It is Not just like my lack of ability of being grateful for what I have and focusing too much on future accomplishments.

Speaker 2:

No, I didn't think of it as lack of gratefulness at all. It was a mindset to pursue and to continue. And as you were talking, I was thinking about that like where do we get that? And maybe it comes from our environment. It comes from the environment we live in currently, but maybe some of it comes from the environment we grew up in. And you hear about young people who, if they're told you can't do it and you're not smart enough and it won't work and you don't have the ability, they don't. And then those who believe that they can and they do, can and do. And if you are in an environment that cultivates belief, you make it happen.

Speaker 3:

Maybe that's why I try so hard to push myself and try new shit and constantly move forward, like every time that I'm journaling and I'm putting down, like what I'm grateful for or whatever, it's always how resilient I feel that I am Because I have to endure so much. But then also I feel like there's burnout that comes with it, which then brings you back to the things that you were talking about having to reenergize yourself and I've talked in depth about a lot of the things I do to reenergize myself. But it does feel like a battle sometimes, like sometimes I wish it was just like I wish it would ebb and flow a little bit more, because it's always consistently like be resilient, be resilient here's an obstacle, here's a challenge and then having to overcome it.

Speaker 2:

Maybe there is a piece of that that is you pushing you. Maybe you push beyond all the time. Maybe there's some places you need to recognize some of your accomplishments and your small victories and give yourself a pat on the back.

Speaker 3:

That is a great point, because I started like a goal log, like goal tracking thing, and I was summarizing 2023. And I was in a mindset beforehand of just all the things I wanted to get done and accomplish and where I want to go and I'm not where I thought I would be, and all that type of shit. Then I wrote down some of the things that I had accomplished in 2023. And I was like holy shit, like literally there were things that I was trying to accomplish for years, like literal years, and I was able to fucking finally do it and I was like I didn't have a horrible year, it just I could have made a huge list of things, and that did make me feel a little bit better. So I think reflecting on our accomplishments can put things into perspective, because in the beginning of the year, like early 2023, if I were to write those things down I had in previous years, I had wrote them down Like this is what I want to accomplish. Never got it done. Finally got it done somehow. So that's a good point.

Speaker 1:

I think it's important to always keep that in mind going forward too, because that's a great example of what you shared. Like I'm always feeling that I'm I don't want to say struggling, but I'm in constant resilient mode because I'm pushing and wanting to accomplish and having a feeling like I'm not, whether not at the pace I want or not the actual thing, whatever the case may be. But in reflection, you did do a lot more than you're in. So it just makes me think of the situation of someone who, with every step they take and achieve or whatever, they don't stop and think about that and they're just looking for the next one, next one, next one, and it's almost like a constant here's what I don't have versus here what I do or what I've accomplished.

Speaker 3:

And what you're. So right now I can really. I got this visualization, as you were saying, that of like walking up like a gigantic staircase and always being like looking up and ahead and you go forever and you look up and it's just still extending beyond how far you can see, but never looking back at how high up you are.

Speaker 1:

You've come. Yeah, excellent analogy. I love that. I've seen a video about a coach who blindfolded a player with the exercise of having him do like a bear crawl on the field and the kid said something like I can only probably make him yeah. Like, bring him down, like I can only oh, is it from a movie? Okay, yeah, with the kid on his back. Yeah, I saw the clip on YouTube and you know what he said I can only probably go 20 yards, 50 yards, whatever.

Speaker 3:

Right.

Speaker 1:

But he actually had a lot more in him than he realized. And yeah, if he had not been blindfolded, he would have been looking at how much more he has to go versus what he has done. So it's kind of similar.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, if you want to bring that to small scale, what you just reminded me of. This is a much tinier scale, but when I was working with a fitness trainer, we would end each workout with a plank and I would tell him I you're gonna have to tell me a story. Well, I do this to keep my mind going, cause he was like you have to do a minute plank and I had no intention belief that I could do a minute. But if he told me a story, my mind would be preoccupied. What I never knew, because I never looked at the clock and I always just trusted him. I was doing two minutes, I was doing more.

Speaker 1:

I was gonna say watch him trick you.

Speaker 2:

And I was exceeding, and sometimes we have to let go of those. I don't know if they're barriers or guidelines or whatever they are, but we have to let go and distrust ourselves.

Speaker 3:

Limiting beliefs. Yeah those, yeah, those damn things.

Speaker 2:

Turn. Well, so let's just name those things that we've talked about through this episode that help us build resilience and recognize that we should be proud of every time we find the mental toughness to get through a situation. But our overall intention is then to build enough resilience to do that thing easier, more easily, the next time. And that comes with self-reflection Kevin named it, you know, reflecting on whatever accomplishments we've had, what gives us joy, what brings ease, makes one smile. Focus on that. Excellent Thanks for joining us Today. We'll be back soon.

Speaker 1:

Bye for now. Stay focused.

Resiliency vs Mental Toughness
Building Resilience and Mental Toughness
Developing Resilience and Recognizing Accomplishments